What has been cracking me up over the last few days is a thought problem.
Everyone works to advance themselves in one way or another. What happens when you find yourself in a field you can excel at, but have an Achilles heel for? I am not a negotiator, but the field that I find myself in and doing very well with does not reward merit. It rewards negotiation. You are only worth what people are willing to pay for you. If you would like to price yourself out of their range, you are more than welcome to do so.
The field does not operate in the same ways the rest of the customer service field operates. If you want a job you can have one and if they ask what you would like to be paid you are welcome to write down whatever number you choose and they will come back to you with the starting and only number and you either say "yes" or you say "no." Very simple. Very straightforward. Very easy.
I have been laughing trying to gauge what I am worth to other people. In this field, what you are worth is an algorithm whose nuances run deep, parallel, and cross cut with sudden violence and stark contrast with blood and bone on the line should a miscalculation be made. There is no room for guesswork. Or is it that there is infinite room for guesswork because time is money and time is beholden to whom. For whom does the bell toll these days? For how long can negotiations continue and if you did get what you wanted, when would you feel armored and steeled and learned enough to ask for more? To demand more. Hell, if I know.
Given what I know, where I've been, the way I carry the fire like it is my pants on fire when the client's is, the willingness to tax flesh and artery until the tread falls off to make the date agreed on, I still have no idea what those values register on someone else's Richter scale. I still have no idea what dialing my number means to them when they want something done right, done thorough, and finished to the dotted "I." In terms of valuation, I don't know what I'm worth, but I'm pretty, inexactly, sure I am a cost effective means to whatever ends are summoned.
I am well trained and well versed in many modes. Control is lacking, but only because it is not easy to corral 700 horses in one direction at the same time; we manage. Adaptable, robust, and the commercial ends.
It does crack me up. Folks tell you so-and-so should be paying you "X" amount of dollars. Person "C" should have paid you this-and-that. What is stopping you from paying me what I'm actually worth? I'm not going to say no to money. I'm not going to ask for more. What's stopping you from returning a smile to me the way I gave one to you that you will enjoy much longer than the life span of the paper that passes from my hands to vendors? That is what has made me laugh lately.
You hear the same thing from so many different people and it makes us wonder if my asking for more money will actually change anything in the right direction. You've seen my body of work. You know what I can and cannot yet do. You know what you can ask me to do. I know what I can ask us to do. We are all familiar with one another and are either friends or thoroughly acquainted to a degree that we can rely on one another to follow through on our word. Why don't you trust me yet to do what I say I can do and have done? Why do I have to ask for more?
You've seen me operate enough times. I've worked with you enough times. If you believe I am some sort of benchmark to keep, you are mistaken. I am skewing the market low. What really, what really, cracked me up (because I had no option beyond cackle laughter) was thinking about all of the over paid clowns you rowd and rail about. Wondering why this clown is somehow ten times more efficient, ten times more reliable, 60 times more faithful, five times more communicative, 100 times more driven, and ten times more accessible and somehow.............. somehow.......... worth less to you than the other, menial, infantry clowns you employ.
Grade S infantry? "No, I will settle for grade D and pay them like a scientist apprentice."
Maybe, I'm just not cooperative enough. Eventually the question will boil over and we will have a discussion to resolve points that our sextants align. In the face of heartache, the only option is irrational, hysterical, laughter.
///Stereolab - "The Free Design" live
Everyone works to advance themselves in one way or another. What happens when you find yourself in a field you can excel at, but have an Achilles heel for? I am not a negotiator, but the field that I find myself in and doing very well with does not reward merit. It rewards negotiation. You are only worth what people are willing to pay for you. If you would like to price yourself out of their range, you are more than welcome to do so.
The field does not operate in the same ways the rest of the customer service field operates. If you want a job you can have one and if they ask what you would like to be paid you are welcome to write down whatever number you choose and they will come back to you with the starting and only number and you either say "yes" or you say "no." Very simple. Very straightforward. Very easy.
I have been laughing trying to gauge what I am worth to other people. In this field, what you are worth is an algorithm whose nuances run deep, parallel, and cross cut with sudden violence and stark contrast with blood and bone on the line should a miscalculation be made. There is no room for guesswork. Or is it that there is infinite room for guesswork because time is money and time is beholden to whom. For whom does the bell toll these days? For how long can negotiations continue and if you did get what you wanted, when would you feel armored and steeled and learned enough to ask for more? To demand more. Hell, if I know.
Given what I know, where I've been, the way I carry the fire like it is my pants on fire when the client's is, the willingness to tax flesh and artery until the tread falls off to make the date agreed on, I still have no idea what those values register on someone else's Richter scale. I still have no idea what dialing my number means to them when they want something done right, done thorough, and finished to the dotted "I." In terms of valuation, I don't know what I'm worth, but I'm pretty, inexactly, sure I am a cost effective means to whatever ends are summoned.
I am well trained and well versed in many modes. Control is lacking, but only because it is not easy to corral 700 horses in one direction at the same time; we manage. Adaptable, robust, and the commercial ends.
It does crack me up. Folks tell you so-and-so should be paying you "X" amount of dollars. Person "C" should have paid you this-and-that. What is stopping you from paying me what I'm actually worth? I'm not going to say no to money. I'm not going to ask for more. What's stopping you from returning a smile to me the way I gave one to you that you will enjoy much longer than the life span of the paper that passes from my hands to vendors? That is what has made me laugh lately.
You hear the same thing from so many different people and it makes us wonder if my asking for more money will actually change anything in the right direction. You've seen my body of work. You know what I can and cannot yet do. You know what you can ask me to do. I know what I can ask us to do. We are all familiar with one another and are either friends or thoroughly acquainted to a degree that we can rely on one another to follow through on our word. Why don't you trust me yet to do what I say I can do and have done? Why do I have to ask for more?
You've seen me operate enough times. I've worked with you enough times. If you believe I am some sort of benchmark to keep, you are mistaken. I am skewing the market low. What really, what really, cracked me up (because I had no option beyond cackle laughter) was thinking about all of the over paid clowns you rowd and rail about. Wondering why this clown is somehow ten times more efficient, ten times more reliable, 60 times more faithful, five times more communicative, 100 times more driven, and ten times more accessible and somehow.............. somehow.......... worth less to you than the other, menial, infantry clowns you employ.
Grade S infantry? "No, I will settle for grade D and pay them like a scientist apprentice."
Maybe, I'm just not cooperative enough. Eventually the question will boil over and we will have a discussion to resolve points that our sextants align. In the face of heartache, the only option is irrational, hysterical, laughter.
///Stereolab - "The Free Design" live
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