Subject : admittedly wrong about something
Posted Date: : Jan 28, 2007 9:03 PM
alright... so a while back i bashed inuyasha... but recently (having seen it several nights in a row) the show has got some good writing behind it. not dialog. but good storytelling. you can jump into the story at any point and find yourself at the beginning or end of a story arch rather quickly and its easy to pick up on the over arching story as well, even from within one of the smaller archs. so there. i was wrong about a tv show. not that i like tv. watching adult swim counts as developing art appreciation... and the history channel might as well be class time, as well as the discovery channel. so i still think tv is for nubbins... discerning nubbins.
while im on the whole confessions roll i would like to add that i enjoy house music. that's right. not the typical house music (then again everyone believes they like music for reasons unique to them which makes the music itself unique... not really true but im gonna keep believing it anyway...) but the kind of house music that is complexly layered. the kind of music you can appreciate like classical music because it provokes new thoughts at every successive rotation. each new listen giving you a new sense of what went into the songs production... or each new listen revealing some nuance you just missed the last time you heard it.
sometimes i wish the music world was not so various as to allow me to literally traverse years without ever stepping into another genre, and comfortably continue to not do so... but then what would i do with a spare hour here and there, if not take steps to expand my horizons. sometimes i feel like a puppy who always played in one part of the yard and progressively fanned out, peeing on more shrubs and digging more holes and rolling in grass farther and farther away from my dog house until i hit a fence. thats what exploring music is like for me. i kind of just wander on in one direction until i hit something that i can say with confidence is completely different from where i started... then i turn around and head back to the familiar until i reach zero again. then its off in a new direction to see how far i can get before i cant go any farther without being in someone elses back yard.
///Cop Shoot Cop - "All The Clocks Are Broken" something from back in the day to seriously bang your head against the walls to. if you've ever felt like dismantling the world this band is a good place to start.
Clean with alcohol only. Do not attempt to replace blown fuses. Do not remove access panels. Return to certified mechanic for regular maintenance. Made in the USA.
1/25/07
people are strange (p1) 01/25/07
Subject : people are strange (part 1)
Posted Date: : Jan 25, 2007 10:28 AM
"fitness secrets."
whyyyy do people learn things and then purposefully prevent other people from learning how to better themselves through what they've learned? maybe a person doesnt have the time or money to hire a professional fitness consultant... but jeez do you really have to let everyone know that you know how to take better care of yourself through "six simple steps" and then go to great lengths to prevent the knowledge from being shared? its like someone learning how to save money while in college and then telling people that they know how to save money in college without having to cut every corner and then telling the people (who are now eager to hear their "secrets") that they infact will not tell them how to do it, but will instead only tell some of the people who have enough money to buy the information.
the information age sucks. its not just the fitness secrets that annoy... its just every information commodity out there... or at least most of them. (hah... thats a funny construction. at least most. i kill me sometimes.) anyway... thats it for now. if you take anything away from this its the knowledge that you should hate the information age too.
actually thats not it for now... in the spirit of an aussie myspace friend of mine (J.S.) who used to list a song after every blog entry, who has decided he needs a break from the web, i will start listing music that /i/ feel is worth listening too.
Bush "Swallowed - (goldie - "toasted both sides remix") If there was a song playing when god and lucifer finally had it out in heaven this was it. hellish, brooding, and tainted with so much pent up rage you can almost taste the sparks when swords crossed.
Posted Date: : Jan 25, 2007 10:28 AM
"fitness secrets."
whyyyy do people learn things and then purposefully prevent other people from learning how to better themselves through what they've learned? maybe a person doesnt have the time or money to hire a professional fitness consultant... but jeez do you really have to let everyone know that you know how to take better care of yourself through "six simple steps" and then go to great lengths to prevent the knowledge from being shared? its like someone learning how to save money while in college and then telling people that they know how to save money in college without having to cut every corner and then telling the people (who are now eager to hear their "secrets") that they infact will not tell them how to do it, but will instead only tell some of the people who have enough money to buy the information.
the information age sucks. its not just the fitness secrets that annoy... its just every information commodity out there... or at least most of them. (hah... thats a funny construction. at least most. i kill me sometimes.) anyway... thats it for now. if you take anything away from this its the knowledge that you should hate the information age too.
actually thats not it for now... in the spirit of an aussie myspace friend of mine (J.S.) who used to list a song after every blog entry, who has decided he needs a break from the web, i will start listing music that /i/ feel is worth listening too.
Bush "Swallowed - (goldie - "toasted both sides remix") If there was a song playing when god and lucifer finally had it out in heaven this was it. hellish, brooding, and tainted with so much pent up rage you can almost taste the sparks when swords crossed.
1/24/07
time to play... 01/24/07
Subject : time to play name that mental disorder
Posted Date: : Jan 24, 2007 8:15 AM
"characterized by delusions (of persecution or grandeur or jealousy); symptoms may include anger and anxiety and aloofness and doubts about gender identity; patients are usually presentable and may function in an apparently normal manner. can also suffer from hallucinations, thought disorder, poor social functioning, disordered perception, retreat from reality, regressive behavior, and flattened emotions."
that sums me up almost too perfectly. big surprise. sometimes i love being unmedicated... sometimes i dont.
Posted Date: : Jan 24, 2007 8:15 AM
"characterized by delusions (of persecution or grandeur or jealousy); symptoms may include anger and anxiety and aloofness and doubts about gender identity; patients are usually presentable and may function in an apparently normal manner. can also suffer from hallucinations, thought disorder, poor social functioning, disordered perception, retreat from reality, regressive behavior, and flattened emotions."
that sums me up almost too perfectly. big surprise. sometimes i love being unmedicated... sometimes i dont.
1/23/07
its that time of the year again 01/23/07
Subject : its that time of the year again
Posted Date: : Jan 23, 2007 7:41 PM
writing contests. the two big ones at Carnegie Mellon University. oh boy. another chance to get stiffed by my favorite group of insiders at the X review (insiders meaning the circle of friends i dont have at the journal's core that run the submission selection process including the professors) and ignored by the wonderful Y judges. i think my writing just doesnt quite fit here.
i mean two years running ive gotten polar comments on everything. either its over written or its under developed. its too dense or its too cliche'. its too "in my own world" or its too simple. that last one is my favorite though. i take that last one as knowing im doing something right. im aware of what other poets have done. im aware of what other story tellers have done. i might not be aware of what everyone else is currently doing, but if i was i would be less aware of what i want to do. one thing ive learned about myself as a writer is that i like what i do. what i do has changed and continues to change over the days and months. i know im not writing well when im writing the same things i wrote at the same time last year.
still though... these are the dread hours. will this year end with more dissappointments? probably. in fact... almost assuredly. im pretty sure who the favorites already are. im pretty sure of where the student bodies work has a proclivity to wander (usually toward work that makes pittsburgh or city or just college life "come alive" or sad tidbits about family and rent hearts or the difficulty of "growing up") but im still going to write my way, my stories, my poems and if i dont win i may give them all the murderface for a few days... then a look of hurt puzzlement... but ultimately i'll be just as happy as if i did win. cuz i wuz last year. im not graduating anyway so i dont even have to worry about resume' padding.
i think im actually looking forward to this. win, lose, or draw. i still hate them though.
Posted Date: : Jan 23, 2007 7:41 PM
writing contests. the two big ones at Carnegie Mellon University. oh boy. another chance to get stiffed by my favorite group of insiders at the X review (insiders meaning the circle of friends i dont have at the journal's core that run the submission selection process including the professors) and ignored by the wonderful Y judges. i think my writing just doesnt quite fit here.
i mean two years running ive gotten polar comments on everything. either its over written or its under developed. its too dense or its too cliche'. its too "in my own world" or its too simple. that last one is my favorite though. i take that last one as knowing im doing something right. im aware of what other poets have done. im aware of what other story tellers have done. i might not be aware of what everyone else is currently doing, but if i was i would be less aware of what i want to do. one thing ive learned about myself as a writer is that i like what i do. what i do has changed and continues to change over the days and months. i know im not writing well when im writing the same things i wrote at the same time last year.
still though... these are the dread hours. will this year end with more dissappointments? probably. in fact... almost assuredly. im pretty sure who the favorites already are. im pretty sure of where the student bodies work has a proclivity to wander (usually toward work that makes pittsburgh or city or just college life "come alive" or sad tidbits about family and rent hearts or the difficulty of "growing up") but im still going to write my way, my stories, my poems and if i dont win i may give them all the murderface for a few days... then a look of hurt puzzlement... but ultimately i'll be just as happy as if i did win. cuz i wuz last year. im not graduating anyway so i dont even have to worry about resume' padding.
i think im actually looking forward to this. win, lose, or draw. i still hate them though.
philosophy phucks 01/23/07
Subject : philosophy phucks
Posted Date: : Jan 23, 2007 5:13 PM
so im taking philosophy courses. two and unfortunately two too many. on the one hand there is an overview course called "what philosphy is" and the other hand there is "the philosophy of language and thought."
the first course is too shallow for my tastes. apparently its only goal is to teach you how to think as rigorously as a mathematician in your everyday reasoning. a worthy cause i suppose. few things can be more frustrating than dealing with people that have illogical jumps to ridiculous conculsions but at the same time... part of being human is taking leaps because there is rarely time for rigor. i guess thats probably why people live to be more than two years old. time enough to learn to think with enough rigor to not get yourself killed (at least not easily) but certainly not more rigorously than that.
its not the point though. the class keeps poking at ideas and examples of rigorous thought (like plato's touching on how to define justice ... or was it socrates) but there is no delving into a questioning of the thoughts that are posed. all the professor wants to do is raise questions without discussing them. ah well. i understand he has to push things forward so i guess if iwanna know more ill have to go lavar burton on his ass and read a book myself.
the other class jsut sucks. its about the logic of language not the philosophy. its lame. its basically doing logical proofs to explain language. i mean its neat and all but certainly not teaching me what i want to know and furthering my illogical frustration with philosophy. it hurts my fucking head sometimes. people are not more or less just and justice is not a skill and even if it were a skill then surely there can be people born without it so what do you do with the people that cant cultivate the skill of justice, socrates! what do you do! shoot them off into space! thats what you fucking do. no harm. no foul.
philosophy sucks.
Posted Date: : Jan 23, 2007 5:13 PM
so im taking philosophy courses. two and unfortunately two too many. on the one hand there is an overview course called "what philosphy is" and the other hand there is "the philosophy of language and thought."
the first course is too shallow for my tastes. apparently its only goal is to teach you how to think as rigorously as a mathematician in your everyday reasoning. a worthy cause i suppose. few things can be more frustrating than dealing with people that have illogical jumps to ridiculous conculsions but at the same time... part of being human is taking leaps because there is rarely time for rigor. i guess thats probably why people live to be more than two years old. time enough to learn to think with enough rigor to not get yourself killed (at least not easily) but certainly not more rigorously than that.
its not the point though. the class keeps poking at ideas and examples of rigorous thought (like plato's touching on how to define justice ... or was it socrates) but there is no delving into a questioning of the thoughts that are posed. all the professor wants to do is raise questions without discussing them. ah well. i understand he has to push things forward so i guess if iwanna know more ill have to go lavar burton on his ass and read a book myself.
the other class jsut sucks. its about the logic of language not the philosophy. its lame. its basically doing logical proofs to explain language. i mean its neat and all but certainly not teaching me what i want to know and furthering my illogical frustration with philosophy. it hurts my fucking head sometimes. people are not more or less just and justice is not a skill and even if it were a skill then surely there can be people born without it so what do you do with the people that cant cultivate the skill of justice, socrates! what do you do! shoot them off into space! thats what you fucking do. no harm. no foul.
philosophy sucks.
1/22/07
email anxiety 01/22/07
Subject : email anxiety
Posted Date: : Jan 22, 2007 5:18 PM
email anxiety has kept me from going anywhere near textual interfaces on the web. i know there are a million emails there. i know they are unread. i know many of them have absolutely nothing to do with me... but i dread seeing them. i hate thinking about them building up like ticks on my in box. can you imagine what a dog absolutely covered in ticks looks like? i fucking can and its disgusting. absolutely disgusting. i would rather just throw the dog in a furnace than go to the trouble of de-ticking it into a big bloody but somehow tick free mess. plus my inbox hates me. nothing good ever turns up there. just a whole lot of imperatives.
so thats where ive been. ive essentially been hiding from the internet. but ive buckled down and took it on the chin like a champ and bought a new dog to replace the old one. mass deletion isn't a bad thing. chances are good most of the stuff wouldnt even be relevant since most people i know send emails about things they want or need within a day or two. its the rare email thats even worth archiving if you ask me. ill never understand those people that keep every single email ever. that's just scary. and inefficient. im gonna go eat cake now and temporarily vegitate.
Posted Date: : Jan 22, 2007 5:18 PM
email anxiety has kept me from going anywhere near textual interfaces on the web. i know there are a million emails there. i know they are unread. i know many of them have absolutely nothing to do with me... but i dread seeing them. i hate thinking about them building up like ticks on my in box. can you imagine what a dog absolutely covered in ticks looks like? i fucking can and its disgusting. absolutely disgusting. i would rather just throw the dog in a furnace than go to the trouble of de-ticking it into a big bloody but somehow tick free mess. plus my inbox hates me. nothing good ever turns up there. just a whole lot of imperatives.
so thats where ive been. ive essentially been hiding from the internet. but ive buckled down and took it on the chin like a champ and bought a new dog to replace the old one. mass deletion isn't a bad thing. chances are good most of the stuff wouldnt even be relevant since most people i know send emails about things they want or need within a day or two. its the rare email thats even worth archiving if you ask me. ill never understand those people that keep every single email ever. that's just scary. and inefficient. im gonna go eat cake now and temporarily vegitate.
1/2/07
karma 01/02/07
Subject : karma
Posted Date: : Jan 2, 2007 11:58 PM
you owe me one. hardcore. this was supposed to be a happy entry. i had the worst field trip of my life. it was a good adventure, but good adventures have hurty endings sometimes...
.... ugh.
more later. go blow yourselves.
and smile. because just when you think you've had the worst day of your life someone actually does. (not that the someone is me, what im trying to say is im still smiling anyway and you should too cuz i know for a fact there is someone out there who had it worse than i did and it pretty much put my troubles into sharp relief)
Posted Date: : Jan 2, 2007 11:58 PM
you owe me one. hardcore. this was supposed to be a happy entry. i had the worst field trip of my life. it was a good adventure, but good adventures have hurty endings sometimes...
.... ugh.
more later. go blow yourselves.
and smile. because just when you think you've had the worst day of your life someone actually does. (not that the someone is me, what im trying to say is im still smiling anyway and you should too cuz i know for a fact there is someone out there who had it worse than i did and it pretty much put my troubles into sharp relief)
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