It isn't. I get overly dramatic. It is a study. It is very important to learn and understand appropriate responses, but the study need not dampen the human inside of you. The human inside of you should never need or be dampened.
To put the darkness forward is a matter of preference, not necessity. To attack every upcoming day is to ask for a war. Approach it analog. It's not coming at you digital. One or zero or one or zero. There is so much more that can be done.
The responses do push from one boundary to the other, but it is possible to find a zero beside the one, a one nestled in beside the zero, and start a new language. That's happy. Bad in a good way. It's easier to view digitally, but better to view analog.
Failure is vision. Wear your eyes. Use them or be prepared to lose them and cry through your nose because nothing is supporting your eyelids. Power chords. I know I get obsessed with damage control. It's only because damage is very difficult to control.
Damage requires a ton of run cycles and making plans A through G takes a ton of run cycles too. I do wonder what I look like from the outside in these days. It's a curiosity that demands attention. It's not all bad though. Don't let me get you down.
I have a lot of questions. As I'm navigating my way through the years and continuing to find new ways to look at the mission and questioning the mission and my own value within the operations frame works, I am finding light not easy to describe.
At least, not easy to describe better without using terms embracing negative pasts. It kind of strikes me as learning how to compose drawings using negative space. Instead of tracing the damage and the brush fires limits, tracing the brush.
Tracing the wild life instead of the pelts. Nature still speaks to me. Tech and currency still eats me. People continue to fascinate me though I find them terrifically repellent. I try to keep one ear on the ground and one up to the sky.
I have to reassure myself that I am fine. I have to maintain my distance. I cannot allow distance to dissolve. What I want cannot be obtained through casual means. It will take explicit and thorough aggression.
We are years away. It's not all guts and glory. Relax. Absorb and do not over think. It's not all bad. It's not all analysis. Do not remove the human from inside you.
///Bjork - "Hidden Place" im simply suggesting
Clean with alcohol only. Do not attempt to replace blown fuses. Do not remove access panels. Return to certified mechanic for regular maintenance. Made in the USA.
Showing posts with label film noir. Show all posts
Showing posts with label film noir. Show all posts
5/16/14
9/8/10
Predictive Power of the Bible, Religious Cunts, and Cowboy Coffee
Being the coffee addict I am today, I've been trying to figure out ways to cut costs from making coffee and ensure that I will never be in a situation where I can't drink coffee if said substance is available in absolutely any form. Having read Cormac McCarthy's Cities of the Plain I have ingested another serious dose of tough guy-dom the likes of which I haven't shot into my veins since I watched hard boiled noir where every ten minutes a cigarette was being rolled, a shot of whiskey downed, and a strong man got his lights put out with a "you'll find my appointment with your boss under 'screw you', sonny."
Which brings me to cowboy coffee. Easily on par with "badass things that will probably kill you" that I love, such as Marlboro Red 100s and high proof whiskey on rocks, is cowboy coffee. From what I've gathered from Cities of the Plain is that they don't use coffee filters at all. Or at least, they seem to have to throw out the last of their coffee pretty often because of left over grounds, and that got me to thinking that cow hands and outdoorsmen in general probably don't carry coffee filters out into the field. That's like throwing light bulbs in a ruck sack and somehow believing you'll make it to where you're going without breaking a single one. At least I think keeping coffee filters dry while being outside in the elements for weeks would be something akin to that kind of challenge. So it must be possible to drink coffee brewed from grounds with the grounds still in the water if you let them settle to the bottom of whatever you brewed it in. So that's what I've started doing. I've always liked the bitter bite of black as night coffee and I've found that throwing the grounds in a big ol' mug and brewing it straight in the mug and letting the grounds settle down to the bottom seems to work out just fine. Coffee filters are officially for pansies. Of course drinking it this way might turn my teeth black, but lets hope I have a job and never have to rely on the quality of my smile again long before that happens. Sure the last sips are grainy and if you swish the mug around too much it takes on the consistency of a snow globe full of pine chips, but if you've got a steady hand, and an iron gut, and like things like whiskey and Marlboro Reds and Ice grade beer, I highly recommend giving it a try.
Plus if you ever find that your co-workers have bought coffee grounds instead of instant coffee and stuck them in the common break room knowing full well that the only coffee machine in the entire god damn building is behind the key coded doors of the administrative wing where lowly salesman and customer service associates are not allowed, you can go ahead and make yourself a cup anyway. You may not come to work in a tie, or slacks, or a sport coat, but while they look at you from the corner of their eyes in the break room wondering if you're thinking about shanking them all with a hunting knife while you watch your mug spin around in the microwave and they try not to look directly at you and your cowboy coffee sitting at the table across from them, they'll know where the real power sits between them and you. And they'll know that the only thing keeping them on top of the darwinian bureaucratic food chain is a sheet of paper from a business school and an economy that says you have to play nice if you want to keep your freedom.
I am sick of religious cunts. I know you are too. That idiot who is organizing the book burning for the sole purpose of doing unto others is a cunt. A stupid, sad little man. All of the people who will take personal religion fueled offense to what he is organizing and proposing to do are cunts. In this case I am defining cunt as: reactionary imbecile far too pleased with causes to examine effects. Cunts love cunts and their relatinship simply sucks for everybody, especially when they get together for date nights. And for the last time, the Bible does not predict the future anymore than Nostradamus or that Chinese book whose name I can't remember. For every person who raises their child based on precedents set by the Bible, proclaiming it as the ultimate authority on human behavior, can I just say will you please stop reading and start listening to and learning about the human beings in your house that for better and worse have to rely on you for whatever reason. Stop holding up the Bible to life and looking for answers. Spoiler Alert: They're not in there. When you start holding up something you believe to be a map or a blueprint, but still attempt to find you're own way or allow free expression, guess what happens? If you answered "a shit load of self fulfilling prophecies" you answered correctly. If you answered "a shit load of pain and suffering for everyone who does not share your special insight from heaven" you also answered correctly.
Well, anyway, sorry I just had to let that go. I heard about someone being lectured about how their parents believe the Bible says the youngest child will do everything the older children did except ten times worse and so their parents sat them down and gave them an earful for things they've never done and never intend to do and the sheer ridiculousness of it all just pissed me off. If you spent half as much time taking an actual interest in your children as you did combing through the all knowing scriptures you might find that you actually had a family instead of a brood of complete strangers who don't talk to you because you've become a shell of a human being replaced by selected passages of a book that happened to be relevant to you as an adolescent that grew into a sick and warped crutch as you grew older and quietly refused to mature. I think I'll still write my own Bible, just to prove a point about the power of that kind of story telling. Maybe I'll save the project for my twilight years so I'll have a deeper catalog of crap to draw from and smear out into images that can applied to any and all ages that involve fallible people dealing with fallible people in a search for overarching meaning, an incorruptible truth, and the reason, their own tailored to fit reason, for being on this rock. Maybe that's what my life's work really is. I'll get back to you about that in 25 years when I'm on my death bed from smoking Reds and pounding cowboy coffee.
///DJ? Acucrack - "Thalidomide" Our defects are inherited from the ignorance of those that walked before us and are incorporated into our character. That's still no excuse. For bringing darkness instead of light. This song rolls and burns like staring directly into a halogen bulb till your brainstem goes numb with the over powering presence of particulate everything blowing your eyes to pieces. Only minus the permanent blindness.
Which brings me to cowboy coffee. Easily on par with "badass things that will probably kill you" that I love, such as Marlboro Red 100s and high proof whiskey on rocks, is cowboy coffee. From what I've gathered from Cities of the Plain is that they don't use coffee filters at all. Or at least, they seem to have to throw out the last of their coffee pretty often because of left over grounds, and that got me to thinking that cow hands and outdoorsmen in general probably don't carry coffee filters out into the field. That's like throwing light bulbs in a ruck sack and somehow believing you'll make it to where you're going without breaking a single one. At least I think keeping coffee filters dry while being outside in the elements for weeks would be something akin to that kind of challenge. So it must be possible to drink coffee brewed from grounds with the grounds still in the water if you let them settle to the bottom of whatever you brewed it in. So that's what I've started doing. I've always liked the bitter bite of black as night coffee and I've found that throwing the grounds in a big ol' mug and brewing it straight in the mug and letting the grounds settle down to the bottom seems to work out just fine. Coffee filters are officially for pansies. Of course drinking it this way might turn my teeth black, but lets hope I have a job and never have to rely on the quality of my smile again long before that happens. Sure the last sips are grainy and if you swish the mug around too much it takes on the consistency of a snow globe full of pine chips, but if you've got a steady hand, and an iron gut, and like things like whiskey and Marlboro Reds and Ice grade beer, I highly recommend giving it a try.
Plus if you ever find that your co-workers have bought coffee grounds instead of instant coffee and stuck them in the common break room knowing full well that the only coffee machine in the entire god damn building is behind the key coded doors of the administrative wing where lowly salesman and customer service associates are not allowed, you can go ahead and make yourself a cup anyway. You may not come to work in a tie, or slacks, or a sport coat, but while they look at you from the corner of their eyes in the break room wondering if you're thinking about shanking them all with a hunting knife while you watch your mug spin around in the microwave and they try not to look directly at you and your cowboy coffee sitting at the table across from them, they'll know where the real power sits between them and you. And they'll know that the only thing keeping them on top of the darwinian bureaucratic food chain is a sheet of paper from a business school and an economy that says you have to play nice if you want to keep your freedom.
I am sick of religious cunts. I know you are too. That idiot who is organizing the book burning for the sole purpose of doing unto others is a cunt. A stupid, sad little man. All of the people who will take personal religion fueled offense to what he is organizing and proposing to do are cunts. In this case I am defining cunt as: reactionary imbecile far too pleased with causes to examine effects. Cunts love cunts and their relatinship simply sucks for everybody, especially when they get together for date nights. And for the last time, the Bible does not predict the future anymore than Nostradamus or that Chinese book whose name I can't remember. For every person who raises their child based on precedents set by the Bible, proclaiming it as the ultimate authority on human behavior, can I just say will you please stop reading and start listening to and learning about the human beings in your house that for better and worse have to rely on you for whatever reason. Stop holding up the Bible to life and looking for answers. Spoiler Alert: They're not in there. When you start holding up something you believe to be a map or a blueprint, but still attempt to find you're own way or allow free expression, guess what happens? If you answered "a shit load of self fulfilling prophecies" you answered correctly. If you answered "a shit load of pain and suffering for everyone who does not share your special insight from heaven" you also answered correctly.
Well, anyway, sorry I just had to let that go. I heard about someone being lectured about how their parents believe the Bible says the youngest child will do everything the older children did except ten times worse and so their parents sat them down and gave them an earful for things they've never done and never intend to do and the sheer ridiculousness of it all just pissed me off. If you spent half as much time taking an actual interest in your children as you did combing through the all knowing scriptures you might find that you actually had a family instead of a brood of complete strangers who don't talk to you because you've become a shell of a human being replaced by selected passages of a book that happened to be relevant to you as an adolescent that grew into a sick and warped crutch as you grew older and quietly refused to mature. I think I'll still write my own Bible, just to prove a point about the power of that kind of story telling. Maybe I'll save the project for my twilight years so I'll have a deeper catalog of crap to draw from and smear out into images that can applied to any and all ages that involve fallible people dealing with fallible people in a search for overarching meaning, an incorruptible truth, and the reason, their own tailored to fit reason, for being on this rock. Maybe that's what my life's work really is. I'll get back to you about that in 25 years when I'm on my death bed from smoking Reds and pounding cowboy coffee.
///DJ? Acucrack - "Thalidomide" Our defects are inherited from the ignorance of those that walked before us and are incorporated into our character. That's still no excuse. For bringing darkness instead of light. This song rolls and burns like staring directly into a halogen bulb till your brainstem goes numb with the over powering presence of particulate everything blowing your eyes to pieces. Only minus the permanent blindness.
6/27/06
common sensing 06/27/06
Subject : common sensing
Posted Date: : Jun 27, 2006 7:51 AM
i read an interesting piece the other day about film noir.
The piece discussed the fall of tragedy from a tale that depicted the struggles of a hero, a real tale of tumbling from way "up there" to way "down here" and all points southward and more hellish then wherever "here" happens to be, to a tale of the struggles of the common man. It pointed out that the commonizing of tragedy in film noir marks the end of tragedy as a genre because any persons experience could be referred to or depicted as tragic. Then the essay turned. It shifted gears and threw in the exception.
The argument went something like this: "tragedy as it stands today must be reborn into something that not everyone can identify with,but everyone can recognize as uncommon pain not like their own. Tragedy as a genre is not dead. It is only more difficult to properly diagnose. Tragic figures are no longer the aristocrats of society displaced to hell. Tragic figures are those who are already there who are socio-economic minorities and are cut off from the common pool of society, who through incredible and fatalistic turns find themselves somehow further ostracised from the common pool of suffering, which is a far worse place to be because it is suffering without the ability to identify oneself with the common sufferings of your fellow man." thats a total paraphrase. the guy who wrote the piece had a much more in depth argument... but you get the idea (i hope).
the problem with being hard out for luck, in need of support, or on the ropes for any reason is that /everyone/ really believes thiers is the ultimate tragedy, and they "turned out okay" so why should they help or even try to empathize with you? thank you media for making hugh grant look like the saddest man alive.
according to this article, a true "tragic figure" candidate could be one of the poor bastards interned in cuba who later returns to society, his life in shambles, dirt poor, and with literally no one willing to identify with him because of his nationality, and his own government, the shining united states of america, unwilling to touch him so they wrap him up in red tape, put a nice little tag on him that says "don't worry, it's all taken care of" and poke him into the back corners of everyones minds with a thirty foot pole to quietly rot away like so much discarded food behind a stove.
so next time you read something that sounds like a person is whining about how hard their life is and they didn't just return from a foriegn countries prison camp where they were raped every night as a prisoner of war maybe give some consideration to the idea that they actually are having a hard time of it (assuming, of course, that their whole life isnt one big complaint. there are people that are addicted to sorrow and lamentation, or at least i think there are). instead of accusing them of crying to heaven "WHY ME!!" get out of your own stories of overcoming woes for just a moment, discard your images and ideas of how everyone suffers the same, and take a minute to consider that given their circumstances you really have no frame of reference (besides media, which pollutes, dilutes, and confuses the idea of what is and is not suffering on a day-to-day basis and, loosely, your own personal experiences) to judge them accurately.
this is not to say that you have no right to make your judgements. it is to say that i believe you should not pass judgement based on the idea that you've had it just as bad or know someone who has, when what you're really operating on is an idea based in the commonizing of tragedy and the assumption that suffering is an experience without meter that unifies us all. it doesnt.
i wish i could remember the name of the article... it was very provocative.
Posted Date: : Jun 27, 2006 7:51 AM
i read an interesting piece the other day about film noir.
The piece discussed the fall of tragedy from a tale that depicted the struggles of a hero, a real tale of tumbling from way "up there" to way "down here" and all points southward and more hellish then wherever "here" happens to be, to a tale of the struggles of the common man. It pointed out that the commonizing of tragedy in film noir marks the end of tragedy as a genre because any persons experience could be referred to or depicted as tragic. Then the essay turned. It shifted gears and threw in the exception.
The argument went something like this: "tragedy as it stands today must be reborn into something that not everyone can identify with,but everyone can recognize as uncommon pain not like their own. Tragedy as a genre is not dead. It is only more difficult to properly diagnose. Tragic figures are no longer the aristocrats of society displaced to hell. Tragic figures are those who are already there who are socio-economic minorities and are cut off from the common pool of society, who through incredible and fatalistic turns find themselves somehow further ostracised from the common pool of suffering, which is a far worse place to be because it is suffering without the ability to identify oneself with the common sufferings of your fellow man." thats a total paraphrase. the guy who wrote the piece had a much more in depth argument... but you get the idea (i hope).
the problem with being hard out for luck, in need of support, or on the ropes for any reason is that /everyone/ really believes thiers is the ultimate tragedy, and they "turned out okay" so why should they help or even try to empathize with you? thank you media for making hugh grant look like the saddest man alive.
according to this article, a true "tragic figure" candidate could be one of the poor bastards interned in cuba who later returns to society, his life in shambles, dirt poor, and with literally no one willing to identify with him because of his nationality, and his own government, the shining united states of america, unwilling to touch him so they wrap him up in red tape, put a nice little tag on him that says "don't worry, it's all taken care of" and poke him into the back corners of everyones minds with a thirty foot pole to quietly rot away like so much discarded food behind a stove.
so next time you read something that sounds like a person is whining about how hard their life is and they didn't just return from a foriegn countries prison camp where they were raped every night as a prisoner of war maybe give some consideration to the idea that they actually are having a hard time of it (assuming, of course, that their whole life isnt one big complaint. there are people that are addicted to sorrow and lamentation, or at least i think there are). instead of accusing them of crying to heaven "WHY ME!!" get out of your own stories of overcoming woes for just a moment, discard your images and ideas of how everyone suffers the same, and take a minute to consider that given their circumstances you really have no frame of reference (besides media, which pollutes, dilutes, and confuses the idea of what is and is not suffering on a day-to-day basis and, loosely, your own personal experiences) to judge them accurately.
this is not to say that you have no right to make your judgements. it is to say that i believe you should not pass judgement based on the idea that you've had it just as bad or know someone who has, when what you're really operating on is an idea based in the commonizing of tragedy and the assumption that suffering is an experience without meter that unifies us all. it doesnt.
i wish i could remember the name of the article... it was very provocative.
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