AUTHOR.CALHO: If I didn't write it, I would be hitch hiking cross country to Maine and then Alaska in that order. While taking frequent breaks to spread leaflets. And sit in diners. And write on things because I wasn't at a computer. I may still do that in a few years. Writing this also helps me forget about and better understand the limitations of being human, and keeps me busy enough to allow me no free time to burn the world down.

THEMATIC.ABOUT : Collapse often. The things that hold people together and hold them apart and scatter brains. The things that make thoughts go boom. The things that ooh and aah and [expletive deleted]. Sometimes poking around the margins where responsibility ends and the only one to look to is the Original Equipment Manufacturer and say "but, I already pressed 9 for more options and the menus are exactly the same. Can you just replace it?" The answer will be: "please hold." Sometimes hanging out in dark corners. Sometimes following the train tracks. Looking for ways out and ways in and all the while sharing the things seen and heard and done and drawn and written and scorched and healed and teased and caged and dreamed along the way.

11/12/16

That Instant

Joint pain is reduced, I don't shit blood, I don't experience tremors, I sleep okay, rage is curtailed, I eat better, I can dream, flat affect is diminished, suicidal thoughts are reduced, I don't pee blood, heart rate remains normal, violent diarrhea is never a concern alongside double vision, blood clots are a nonissue, I can make a complete thought, the voices are muted and I can feel a range of feelings and I understand that may be the trade off for the chances of respiratory cancers.  If I have to pick between definite physiological changes and a tilted dice roll, pass the dice and light me up.
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