AUTHOR.CALHO: If I didn't write it, I would be hitch hiking cross country to Maine and then Alaska in that order. While taking frequent breaks to spread leaflets. And sit in diners. And write on things because I wasn't at a computer. I may still do that in a few years. Writing this also helps me forget about and better understand the limitations of being human, and keeps me busy enough to allow me no free time to burn the world down.

THEMATIC.ABOUT : Collapse often. The things that hold people together and hold them apart and scatter brains. The things that make thoughts go boom. The things that ooh and aah and [expletive deleted]. Sometimes poking around the margins where responsibility ends and the only one to look to is the Original Equipment Manufacturer and say "but, I already pressed 9 for more options and the menus are exactly the same. Can you just replace it?" The answer will be: "please hold." Sometimes hanging out in dark corners. Sometimes following the train tracks. Looking for ways out and ways in and all the while sharing the things seen and heard and done and drawn and written and scorched and healed and teased and caged and dreamed along the way.

5/23/10

explanations excuses and



sometimes people complain about being alone. sometimes i complain about being alone. but the truth of the matter is that my mind is crowded, and sometimes its a good thing and sometimes its a thing that threatens to destroy.

ive missed you. i write songs about you. i never sing myself to sleep, but sometimes i like it when you sing to us.

im sorry i didnt give you a song last time. id be lying if i said it wouldnt happen again.

today i was wondering where people go when they die, but then i figured it didn't really matter. where do people go when they live. i dont think that question really matters either.

the downside of thought is that the things really worth expending the energy to think about are the most difficult to crack for their density, but also the easiest to hold and so as they sink to the bottom of oceanic discourse they get picked up and tossed about and litter the landscape and become cliche'd as horseshoe crabs littering a beach. and when someone does pick it up and start to take it apart it becomes silly. i guess a better analogy would be the tool set of things a person needs to situate themselves in time and space. every tool box has a hammer. everyone knows what the hammer is for. but learning to use it well is ... is what.

religion is a tent and a propane grill in the wilderness.

i think i should explain something. there's so much that begs to be explored. i didnt mean to be away for so long. hopefully next time ill be able to bring something back with me.

///fear factory - "21st century jesus (pisschrist)" not on the obsolete album, but still sometimes i listen to albums and hear a story and fear factory's remanufacture is one of those beautifully apocalyptic albums that makes hot sex with the gothic romantic in me.

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