AUTHOR.CALHO: If I didn't write it, I would be hitch hiking cross country to Maine and then Alaska in that order. While taking frequent breaks to spread leaflets. And sit in diners. And write on things because I wasn't at a computer. I may still do that in a few years. Writing this also helps me forget about and better understand the limitations of being human, and keeps me busy enough to allow me no free time to burn the world down.

THEMATIC.ABOUT : Collapse often. The things that hold people together and hold them apart and scatter brains. The things that make thoughts go boom. The things that ooh and aah and [expletive deleted]. Sometimes poking around the margins where responsibility ends and the only one to look to is the Original Equipment Manufacturer and say "but, I already pressed 9 for more options and the menus are exactly the same. Can you just replace it?" The answer will be: "please hold." Sometimes hanging out in dark corners. Sometimes following the train tracks. Looking for ways out and ways in and all the while sharing the things seen and heard and done and drawn and written and scorched and healed and teased and caged and dreamed along the way.

4/19/10

so what now?

this is more or less the new format. why'd it take so long? fuck you. thats why. but seriously... it was hard. lots of going in and tweaking this and that and then previewing/refreshing and seeing what changed.

i worked so hard on it ive had dreams in xhtml css markup for two nights running. can you picture that? i didnt even know it was possible to do that. ive had dreams in spanish when i was taking a 6week crash course in it... but yeah, apparently its possible to dream in xml while simultaneously dreaming in bad spanish. happened yesterday.



it was trippy. stress really does force your brain to ejaculate some pretty awesome chemicals while you're sleeping.

so, in the words of that smart ass from flowers for algernon... "is that it? it is." like the mutherfuckin buddha i have achieved blogger template enlightenment. i can now write my own classic style template or manipulate the new version template with something resembling ease. well easier than you can. is what i am going to continue to tell myself so i feel relevant and valuable to some segment of the population. because i am, thats why.

well, anyway... i hope you like it, cuz ive worked on it so hard that i can't like it. still a lot to fix on here with regard to ... well who cares. when i fix what needs fixing hopefully you'll notice. if not, get bent.

///Beck-"lord only knows" one of the better songs to work to in the small hours of the morning before you remember you were supposed to be in bed 6 hours ago. also a great song to walk home to at 3 am. learn the lyrics. sing the lyrics with a friend on that walk home. you'll be glad you did. or not.
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