Shove Off

Often times, many times, too many times, you cannot shove off where you left go.  It's just fact.  There are no two ways about it.  It's not that not alright, you know?  Sure, it's rotten.  We all get that.  It's not all rotten.  You cannot advance without memory.  You can not advance without recall, dispute me!

They're different.  They are very different things.  Hypothesis and road up to where the pages were included, had you possession of the expansion boxed set.

It's unusual?  Maybe I never picked it up while growing up.  It feels very weird as I've come to understand my body...  am I now finally full grown?

Twenty nine.  The number feels okay, reasonable.  Going backwards my last/earliest memory is looking at the park next to preschool.

Weight is the question.  Topped out around 155 +- 5, third year of college jumped to 160 +- 10 then ten years later topped out around 195 no matter what I do.   Am I now growing into my body?  After all this time?  Laughing indignation?  I do not get it.  I don't get it.  I don't fucking understand it.  Why did it take so long.  How come no one warned me?

Feels reasonable.  Seems reasonable.  I'm pretty sure puberty is not supposed to last 16 years.  That doesn't sound right.  I've noticed my footfalls are heavier with the extra weight.  I have to think farther ahead to not step on or run into things.  Am I officially stocky?  Dear God!  Am I stocky?  Am I permanently 5'11", no less than 190 lbs, arms and legs damn near equal in length?  Well, I'm not okay with that!  It's unsettling.  Why couldn't I have had an abnormally long ring finger or something.

It is a nuisance: having to understand your body and check back to understand the trouble codes on the high line.